Just to get it out...

When Michael was born we knew there would be ups and downs. I was fine with the therapy and early intervention. The slow to start things were actually good for new parents (learning how to do things later than the norm). Each step has been one to celebrate and we have enjoined every minute. I knew the day would come that I couldn't protect him... I just didn't think it would be so soon... today Michael's teacher told be he is being picked on by a couple of kids at recess. He has been acting out a lot at home and complaining that he didn't want to go to school in the morning, but everyday I have made him go and he seemed to be happy when I picked him up. His friends would say good bye and the aids would tell me he had a good day, but that he was pushing on the playground. I joked that the smallest kid on the playground was the bully and to iniciate play he would push because he likes to wrestle. 3 weeks later I have now learned that my sweet boy was just trying to stand up and defend himself. i don't know what to do. His teacher siad they didn't know that this was really what was happening, they would see him push and the kids tattle, but never saw the cause. The kids have been identified and she promised she would take care of it. It took everything in me not to break down right there with him in my arms. He has wanted me to hold him after school, and I have been, he has been asking for more of my attention than normal and I have tried to give it too him... I didn't understand it all until today, and for that I am sorry... I didn't protect him. While sitting in a meeting 3 and a half ears ago with a group of moms complaining about their kids special needs, one mom turned to me and said "your lucky, you have a diagnosis and can talk to other parents about your kid." I looked her dead in the eye and lashed out every fear I felt today, "Your right, I'm lucky because from the moment my child was born I knew his life would be rough and he would have no clue why. Some day this will all be a memory for yours, but for mine he will have to fight to fit in, beg to be accepted and lost in a crowd that doesn't understand him. He will be teased and ridiculed for being who he is. For you this ends at 3, but this is life for me... I'm lucky." Michael is a blessing to me. I love all of my kids, but you have to know that with Michael it is different. He gives me strength, patience and love. I know this is just the beginning, and like everything else we have been through there will be an end. He is strong and forgives easily. (I don't always like the forgiving side of him.) I'm not looking for sympathy, just to get it out. It helped, I cried, and now my head hurts and I am going to go to bed.

New toys are SO CUTE!

All new toys are fun because they are new. But we just got a jumper for Liam and Lily came home from school to say, "Oh my gosh, that is SO CUTE mom!" Michael said, "whoa, what... is... that?" These 2 have been a crack up in the the speech department since Liam was born and even more in the mimicking. So, I will start from the beginning.
The week I brought Liam home was nice, but overwhelming to say the least. I suffered from way more emotional roller coasters then I did with the other 2. Darren went to take a nap, which before you get the wrong idea, I said he should do since he was the one dealing with the older 2 during the night and early mornings that they had decided where play time instead of sleeping. Michael said "I pooped." I told him to get a diaper and the next thing I knew Lily was screaming that there is poop on her potty. I walked into the bathroom to find Michael sitting on Lily's potty with poop smeared down his legs, across her potty, and the big squishy log smushed on the floor. I started to cry. I Lily later told Michael while they were playing, "don't poop on the floor anymore, it makes mommy cry"
Breastfeeding with them is even better. "Mommy you should make water this time" (instead of producing milk, I am now supposed to be a vending machine) A couple of days after Darren went back to work the kids were quiet and I noticed them hiding, both with shirts up and babies to their skin. "Mom, I have to feed my baby, he's hungry" A few minutes after that I had them sit at the table for lunch and was told, "wait, I have to pump first". By the way, Michael thinks his belly button is a nipple and has tried to pump it and told me he would feed Liam "All my self!" and Lily told me "Your boobies are big, mine are little. I just can't feed Liam for you" My mom in law watched Lily and Liam while I went to a field trip with Michael. Liam was crying when she tried to give him a bottle and asked Lily if Liam cries when daddy feeds him, "Daddy doesn't feed Liam..." (she said it like, duh grandma)
They both have been helpful in many ways. We race for diapers and wipes and Lily is always letting Liam know what is cute to wear. She calls him "our families baby". And the second he starts crying Michael has the ETA on the binky. He thinks he is such a big boy. This was our conversation one day
Michael "I hold Liam"
Sierra "ok sit down"
M "on the couch, which one?"
S "you pick" he did and I gave Liam to him and sat facing him on the floor.
M "oh, hi, oh hi, he smile, oh hi, mommy sit!"
S "it's ok I will sit here"
M "no I do it all my self" Liam started to cry
M "mommy binky quick, ready go!"
Knock at the door
M "what that noise like? Get it mommy"
S "Here let me take Liam"
M" no no no, you go, I hold Liam all my self, you be right back. Oh hi oh hi Liam"
I didn't let him keep him, but I thought it was a great attempt. And he pronounces Liams name "hee-num". It is quite cute.

Lily started preschool and the day she was going to go, as we got ready in the morning, she was about to pop. Litterally, if she could have she would have. She has a grin from ear to ear and if you know what I am talking about, that feeling that you could burst at any moment because you are so excited. She could barely contain herself. As we were getting ready to walk out the door Liam was smiling at her and she said, "Mom, Liam is so excited for me to go to preschool, he is smiling at me."

Getting crafty

So I don't have a lot to do during the day (ha) so I look for ways to occupy the time. I do a lot of bows and flowers for hair, but you can only have so many and there isn't that much of a demand if I don't do boutiques more often. So I have been sewing. I have done a couple of things, but thought this was just sew cute, I have to share it. (haha, see what I did in that sentence?)

New Pics!

So it has been a while. I don't know what has kept me away for so long?! Oh wait, I do know. Here are the pictures!

Our New Addition!

Welcome to the world Liam!
Born: July 5, 2010
Weight: 8 lbs
Length: 20 1/4 in

All's quite on the western front!

Well that's at least how it used to be. For those of you who don't know, Michael was having troubles hearing for a while. He failed his hearing test really bad. We knew his tubes had fallen out but didn't know how clogged he was until we went to the doctors. 4 appointments later and one 15 minute surgery and all is well again. In fact, he listens and follows directions, his speech is clearer (and more frequent) and his response to questions is immediate. This was not the case before, in fact, he spent many days on frequent timeouts for not listening and acting out because of his lack of understanding. By the end, the thing he quoted most often was "Understand me?!" and "Focus..." Now that he is the perfect child again, of course my troubles wouldn't be over... Lily is 2 and making me very aware of this! If I am bald after delivery of baby #3, it won't be because of "postpartum alopecia".

Handcrafted Accessories

I put a link on the side bar, up at the top! This is the site where I will be displaying new items. Ordering instructions are available there too.